Daily Rotten Archives March 22, 2002 2001 | 2002 | 2003 | 2004 | 2005 | 2006 | 2007 | 2008 | 2009 | 2010 | 2011 | 2012 FBI enlists Mormon Church for Big Brother DB Salt Lake City Tribune | Submitted by: Reid Fleming "The FBI is consulting LDS Church computer experts who oversee the institution's vast genealogy database to help rebuild the bureau's outdated information system. ... Mormon officials are providing advice for developing name-recognition programs that would assist authorities in finding and tracking suspects." No big deal. The interesting part: "Among its features is a security system that will allow senior officials to check who is accessing confidential files." This is known as usage auditing - THEY NEVER HAD THIS?!?!!! Read article... Abo demands right to spear official BBC | Submitted by: Toughlon "An Aboriginal activist is seeking permission from Australia's High Court to spear a senior police officer to death because he desecrated a sacred fire... Bloomfield said the Detective Superintendent should be charged and tried under what he called white law and then handed over to his people where he would face swift indigenous justice and be speared to death." Read article... Boy proves tree of life is self pruning Atlanta Journal-Constitution | Submitted by: Towel Head "A boy was struck by a go-cart and killed in Gwinnett County Thursday after he jumped in front of it and was thrown against a brick mailbox, officials said. Neighbors told police the 13-year-old boy was playing chicken and had jumped in front of the go-cart three times as it raced up and down Bridlegate Way, which is a cul-de-sac in the Bridlegate at Trotter's Ridge subdivision in Lithonia." Read article... Mr. Balingit lives up to his name Toronto Sun | Submitted by: egoman "The students at Archbishop Romero Catholic Secondary School, near Weston and Rogers Rds., were informed by a message from principal Frank Piddisi over the public address system and later in a letter for their parents that popular teacher Micaelo Balingit, 36, was facing sex assault and threatening charges." Read article... Meathead swings both ways Washington Post | Submitted by: Bill Gonzo This is from the Highest Authority in the land, though a bit late in coming: "Nixon seems to have concluded, against all evidence, that Meathead is bisexual. Possibly it is the length of his hair. Another character in the show, Nixon reports, is "obviously queer. He wears an ascot, and so forth." "I don't want to see this country to go that way. You know what happened to the Greeks. Homosexuality destroyed them. Sure, Aristotle was a homo, we all know that, so was Socrates." Read article... Sing Sing guard jailed for trashcompacting kittens Associated Press | Submitted by: Rio "A former prison guard who crushed five kittens in a trash compactor at Sing Sing was sentenced Friday to a year in jail by a judge who said the crime was "so offensive and so calculated and so gratuitously cruel it diminishes the humanity of everybody." Ronald Hunlock had "searched the inmate's cell, found five newborn kittens and their mother and ordered the inmate to put them in the compactor. When the inmate refused, Hunlock did it himself. The mother cat escaped but the kittens were crushed." Read article... New Anti-Copy bill is scariest proposal yet Wired | Submitted by: Soylent "Legal experts said on Friday that the CBDTPA regulates nearly any program, in source or object code, that runs on a PC or anything else with a microprocessor. That's not just Windows media players and their brethren, as you might expect. The CBDTPA's sweeping definition of "any hardware or software" includes word processors, spreadsheets, operating systems, compilers, programming languages -- all the way down to humble Unix utilities like "cp" and "cat." Read article... Laboratory grown meat: what's for breakfast CNN | Submitted by: Soylent "For the experiment, Benjaminson and colleagues sliced up muscle from large goldfish and placed them in a vat of nutrient-rich liquid. Within a week, the fish nuggets had become 16 percent bigger." This is fantastic news if you enjoy a balanced goldfish breafast every morning. Read article... Jupiterian graffiti perplexing Citybeat | Submitted by: Daoloth "Someone is planting bizarre messages on tiles embedded in the road surface. What the tiles are made of, who is placing them and how they get away with it: all of these questions remain unanswered. What is known is this: We are not alone. The mysterious tiles have been spotted in roads throughout the Western Hemisphere... And what do English historian Arnold Toynbee and filmmaker Stanley Kubrick, creator of Dr. Strangelove and 2001: A Space Odyssey, have to do with resurrecting the dead on planet Jupiter?" Read article...