Daily Rotten Archives January 23, 2003 2001 | 2002 | 2003 | 2004 | 2005 | 2006 | 2007 | 2008 | 2009 | 2010 | 2011 | 2012 School fired up over cannibo-pottery Toronto Star | Submitted by: toker "Several Grade 12 students at Northern Secondary School say their teacher, Louise Moran, told them they are not supposed to be using the school's potter's wheels to fashion clay into pipes, water bongs or items decorated with a marijuana leaf. The issue blew up this week after she refused to fire a piece in the kiln depicting a man with a joint in his mouth and the word "pot" on his shirt, they say." Read article... Fossil hunters claim to find 4 winged dinosaur Wire Services | Submitted by: Sloth "Fossil hunters in China have discovered what may be one of the weirdest prehistoric species ever seen, a four-winged dinosaur that apparently glided from tree to tree. The 128 million year old animal, called Microraptor gui, in honor of Chinese paleontologist Gu Zhiwei, was about 2 1/2 feet long and had two sets of feathered wings, with one set on its forelimbs and the other on its hind legs. Exactly where the creature fits into the evolution of birds and dinosaurs is not clear." Read article... Meet interesting people, and kill them MSNBC | Submitted by: Squeak, the Human Chew Toy ...but do it politely, and try not to offend anyone in the process. Is it considered poor manners to pull the trigger with your left hand? "“I know not to show the soles of my feet, or to try to reach out for things with my left hand,” said Spc. Grant, referring to two seemingly innocuous American habits that can offend in the Arab world." Read article... Bush hides Made in China labels ABC News | Submitted by: Ray Rassi "Someone went to great lengths to ensure the backdrop for President Bush's sales pitch Wednesday on his economic stimulus plan sent all the right messages and none of the wrong. Bush delivered his remarks from a warehouse floor that provided a visual image for his argument that his proposal carries economy-boosting benefits for small businesses. The audience was flanked on all sides by piles of cardboard boxes. Each one of the hundreds of boxes had a piece of paper obscuring its Made in China label." Read article... Rapist stops when victim starts praying Tacoma News-Tribune | Submitted by: Any Mouse "The woman pushed her attacker back and said repeatedly, 'Please, God. Please, God, no. God, please, no.' The man stood up and asked the woman if she was a Christian. When she said yes, he zipped up his pants, apologized and shook her hand, police said." Read article... Oh, why didn't you just say so months ago? Wire Services | Submitted by: Gary MiddleMan The irony baffles. The US basically forced Europe to disgorge its colonies, now we want the good parts. Where is the blatant colonialism of Theodore Rex when you need it? If only to start laughing and stop throwing up. Powell: "But the one thing I can assure you of is that it will be held in trust for the Iraqi people, to benefit the Iraqi people. That is a legal obligation that the occupying power will have." Read article... High school to give Undiplomas to dropouts York Daily Record | Submitted by: Any Mouse High school dropouts in York, PA might soon be given "undiplomas", to drum into their heads that they were failures. Some think that's insulting, but others see it as motivation for students to stay in school. Read article... Did cops rape exotic dancer? Philadelphia Inquirer | Submitted by: Thin Blue Dick "An exotic dancer, at times sobbing and, at others, raising her voice to snap at defense attorneys, yesterday testified that two Philadelphia police officers simultaneously raped her in back of their patrol car last month. One cop performed oral sex on her while the other masturbated, she said. Then, she testified, each forced her to have intercourse with him." Read article... FL prosecutor actually pedophile Mickeynut24 Lakeland Ledger | Submitted by: Gay Jeb "A highly respected prosecutor was taken out of a courtroom during a trial Tuesday and arrested on charges that he stripped and masturbated in front of a Web cam for someone he thought to be a 13-year-old girl, police said... Assistant State Attorney Ira Karmelin was charged with two felonies: soliciting a minor for sex via the Internet and transmitting harmful materials to a minor via the Internet, said Capt. Bernie Presha, a spokesman for the Orange County Sheriff's Office in Orlando." Read article... Prosecuting Pee Wee Village Voice | Submitted by: Macki "According to friends, Reubens's house is a kitsch-crammed Shangri-la, featuring collections of "classic food," E.T. memorabilia, and of course the world's largest Pee-wee reliquary. True to his puckish persona, Reubens also collects vintage erotica, most of it gay. He's especially drawn to the pre-XXX physique magazines that flourished in the post-war decades. Detectives carted off 30,000 items, leaving some 70,000 behind. They spent a year scrutinizing every image in this vast archive, and in the end the district attorney concluded that there was no case." That doesn't stop a rabid L.A. city attorney, however. Read article... Gun and sword attacks leave one dead New Zealand Herald | Submitted by: Kiwi Girl "In a series of incidents, which began in Pipiroa, southwest of Thames, and ended in south Auckland, one woman had her hand severed in a sword attack, another woman had both hands partially severed, a man was shot dead and a couple were taken hostage." Read article... Children sold Harry Potter ecstasy pills BBC | Submitted by: Travis "hong kong" Scobie "Police in the United States have uncovered a drug smuggling ring they say targeted children by stamping Harry Potter's image on ecstasy pills. New York detectives discovered 400,000 tablets worth $6m bearing the image of the popular children's hero. "These Harry Potter brands are targeting a young audience," a special agent with the US Drug Enforcement Administration told the agency." Read article... Love that costs a leg or two The Age | Submitted by: James "A male member of the world's most sexually unequal animal species has finally been found alive. A senior curator at the Melbourne Museum, Mark Norman, has captured and photographed a male blanket octopus. Not only is the hapless male about 100 times smaller than the female of the species, but it dies after having sex with her." Read article... Gaelic-speaking ghost caught on recording The Scotsman | Submitted by: UncleGum "New evidence of ghosts in Edinburgh’s underground city have been recorded on tape by a radio producer... Debbie McPhail claims to have made a recording of a ghoulish voice hissing the words: "Get out" or "Go away" in Gaelic." Right. Read article... Disappearance of crew at sea a bloody mystery Seattle Post-Intelligencer | Submitted by: UncleGum "Somewhere in the Indian Ocean, on the third day of 2003, something happened aboard the High Aim No. 6, a long-line fishing boat... A partial carton of Marlboro cigarettes and a jar of Nescafe were on the dash above the helm in the wheelhouse, along with the captain's reading glasses. The crew members' clothes and international documents were neatly where they should be. But there was no crew." Read article... London Mayor escapes angry clown pie attack ABC TV affiliates | Submitted by: Corehead "The pie-wielding clowns had waited to ambush Ken Livingstone outside a city hall building... The clowns planned to pelt Livingstone with custard pies to protest a new traffic-reduction plan." Read article... Beckham changing the face of female genital hair Mainichi Daily News | Submitted by: LucrezaBorgia "Growing numbers of Japanese women, especially female office workers, are apparently shaping their pubic hair to match the tresses the top midfielder sported while he led his team in the soccer extravaganza Japan co-hosted last year with South Korea. "All women put a lot of care into their hair, but they don't do so much with the hair down below. About the most they'd do is brush it back from behind the bikini line," Yuri, a 22 year old electronics company employee. "(Pubic hairstyling) can make the difference for a girl when she's competing with another girl whose looks are about the same as hers." Read article... Political correctness compromises cultural history BBC | Submitted by: The Lone Gunman "United States poster companies have airbrushed the classic Beatles Abbey Road album cover to remove a cigarette from Paul McCartney's hand. The move was made without the permission of either McCartney or Apple Records, which owns the rights to the image. The original copy shows a barefoot McCartney third in line on the famous road crossing holding a cigarette." Read article... The severed head patent USPTO | Submitted by: The Lone Gunman If you had planned on severing a mammalian animal's head and keeping it alive, prepare to be sued by the patent holder: "This invention involves a device, referred to herein as a "cabinet," which provides physical and biochemical support for an animal's head which has been "discorporated" (i.e., severed from its body). This device can be used to supply a discorped head with oxygenated blood and nutrients, by means of tubes connected to arteries which pass through the neck. After circulating through the head, the deoxygenated blood returns to the cabinet by means of cannulae which are connected to veins that emerge from the neck. A series of processing components removes carbon dioxide and add oxygen to the blood." Read article... Me so horny Mr. Police Chief WKYC-TV 23 Akron | Submitted by: Optuser In the age of caller ID people still think it's fun to prank call people. It's late, you're drunk, horny, and you dial seven random digits. Free solo phone sex ensues. You pass out from the eroticism/drunkeness. Next thing you know the SWAT team has laser beams on your chest. Nice quote at end, "The odds of randomly dialing police chief Walling is about 1 in 10 million. There's a better chance of dying from falling out of bed or becoming parents of quadruplets." Read article... Did you profit from slavery? Chicago wants to know MSNBC | Submitted by: Rufferto "Starting Feb. 6, corporations seeking business with the city of Chicago will be required to disclose whether they ever profited from the slave trade. Supporters of the ordinance eagerly await the filings of several defendants named in a class-action lawsuit being consolidated in Chicago that says they—or their parent companies—profited from slave labor. "You’re going to be surprised to see some of the companies," says Tillman." Read article... Nazis play Jew tag at scout camp Wire Services | Submitted by: Crampon "Parents of more than 100 Danish scouts were outraged over a game of tag at a scout camp in which children acted as Jews wearing yellow Stars of David and tried to escape from adults pretending to be Nazis... The local branch of the Danish Christian FDF scout organization organized the game last weekend at the Kongeaadal school, 260 kilometers (160 miles) southwest of Copenhagen. Jes Imer of the local FDF chapter told the tabloid B.T. that they "may have crossed the line this time with a night game where Nazis chase Jews." Read article... Daily Show Interview The Onion AV Club | Submitted by: Macki We are big fans of the Daily Show over at Daily Rotten. "I started driving around the country visiting the homes and gravesites of past presidents, and I couldn't sell any of the articles I was writing about them. I had met a couple of great characters that worked at the more marginal presidents' homes, one of whom was a guy who was obsessed with Florence Harding, Warren Harding's wife. He's so obsessed with her that he dresses up as her and gives tours of the house, and what was great about it was that it wasn't like a shticky drag-queen act." Read article... No extra points for shooting homosexuals CNN | Submitted by: hughdouche "In the game, the player plays the role of a character called The Postal Dude. He lives in a town where there are all kinds of people, white, black, skinny, fat, straight and gay..." Desi said. "The player can shoot homosexuals, junkies, dogs and cats." Article includes some screen shots. Read article... Pre-9/11 proposal for rocketship at WTC site Wire Services | Submitted by: anonymous "Decades before the World Trade Center was conceived, a revolutionary architect drew plans for a rocket-like skyscraper to be built on that very site. Now, a movement is growing to include his ideas in the redevelopment... Antoni Gaudi, whose architecture changed the face of Barcelona, Spain, in the early 1900s, sketched a design in 1908 for a New York hotel that was never built. It is not known why Gaudi's plans were never realized." Read article... Barcoding babies BBC | Submitted by: Crazy Quagga "Barcodes containing newborn babies' fingerprints are being used to prevent mix-ups over identification... As soon as babies are born their fingerprints, and those of their mothers, are stored in electronic barcodes which mother and baby wear on their wrists." It's only a matter of time before they're tattooed on. Read article... Parents dressed son as Cub Scout to get donations Boston Globe | Submitted by: dianalily "Parents of a 7 year old boy pleaded guilty to scamming neighbors of nearly $700 by dressing their son in a Cub Scouts uniform and going door to door seeking donations for a nonexistent troop. Anthony M. Herman, 46, and Sally Ann Gombocz, 45, of Bethlehem knocked on more than 150 doors between Jan. 7 and Jan. 18, collecting $667 as their son silently smiled, police said." If they'd given the kid to a neighborhood child molester they'd have made more money. Read article... Fourteen year old now in deep shit New York Post | Submitted by: Marla Jones "A 14 year old Long Island boy, who defiantly set school tests that he had failed on fire and tossed them out his suburban bedroom window, accidentally torched his home when the wind blew the blazing embers back into his room." Read article... Springer back in the ring, maybe ABC News | Submitted by: LCP "Talk show host Jerry Springer has a secret of his own to share: He's considering running for the U.S. Senate next year... Springer, a Democrat, said he'll decide by summer whether to challenge George Voinovich, a Republican who has said he'll run for a second term in 2004." He was mayor of Cincinnati. Read article...