Daily Rotten Archives February 1, 2004 2001 | 2002 | 2003 | 2004 | 2005 | 2006 | 2007 | 2008 | 2009 Man stages horrific public suicide Fall River Herald News | Submitted by: Fall River's Finest "A 34-year-old Pakistani man may have taken his own life in a public and gruesome way on Sunday afternoon... Police say the man tied a nylon rope to his neck and also to a pole on Prospect Street. Once inside his car, he may have either stepped on the accelerator or let the car roll down the hill. The car traveled about 30 feet, colliding with a parked vehicle and pushing it onto the curb, before finally coming to a stop. Fall River Police Department spokeswoman Detective Lisa Ahaesy did confirm that the man’s head was separated from his body and lay on the ground outside of the car." Read article... Photos of German cannibal's domicile News of the World | Submitted by: Jonny Plasma "This is the chilling house of horror where jailed cannibal Armin Meiwes, pictured right, butchered, froze and cooked his willing victim. As the killer yesterday began his controversial 8-year sentence for manslaughter, locals in the central German village of Rotenburg were calling for the rotting half-timbered mansion to be pulled down." Read article... School settles lawsuit over idiot principal's fuckwittery Newsday | Submitted by: I Choose The Matrix "The city settled a federal lawsuit filed by five female students who were forced to undergo tests for pregnancy and sexually transmitted diseases after they skipped school to attend a 'hooky party' where there was sexual activity... The amount the girls would be paid was not disclosed... The lawsuit was filed by the New York Civil Liberties Union after the eighth-grade girls cut school last April to attend the party. When they returned to school the next day, they were called to the principal's office and told they had to be tested for pregnancy, HIV and other sexually transmitted diseases, according to the lawsuit. They were told they could not return to school without a doctor's note that included the test results." Read article... and This article... Matrix database continues metastasis KCCI-TV 8 Des Moines | Submitted by: Reid Fleming "Law enforcement officials in Iowa are considering joining a controversial anti-terrorism database run by six other states. The database, known as Matrix, combines police records with public information on ordinary people collected by a Florida company. Law enforcement officials say it allows investigators quick access to various sources of information... The executive director of the Iowa Civil Liberties Union says state officials should hold public hearings on the matter before moving forward." Read article... and This... and This... Ambulance worker arrested for on-the-job pervery Press of Atlantic City | Submitted by: Rio "A New Jersey emergency medical technician has been charged with sexual contact with a 19-year-old woman who was being taken by ambulance to a medical facility. Brian Schaal, 37, faces three to five years in prison if convicted of aggravated criminal sexual contact. Schaal allegedly exposed himself and masturbated as the woman was strapped to a stretcher for the approximately 100-mile ambulance ride from Atlantic County on Nov. 7, authorities said." Read article... City requires net cafes to videotape customers Metropolitan News-Enterprise | Submitted by: Reid Fleming "A local ordinance requiring Internet cafes to conduct video surveillance of their customers as an anti-gang measure is constitutional, the Fourth District Court of Appeal ruled yesterday... At issue in the case was an ordinance enacted by Garden Grove in 2002 after the city’s police chief reported that there had been seven incidents of criminal activity, five of them gang-related, in or near four different Internet cafes in a three-month period. The last such event was the murder of a 20-year old man standing in front of the cafe." Read article... Animal lover thwarted by extraterrestrials, defoliants Miami Herald | Submitted by: Reid Fleming "Miami-Dade police on Friday raided a pig farm, arresting the live-in caretaker and charging him with animal cruelty... Pigs and chickens roamed among abandoned cars, vans and campers, rusted cans, old tires, a broken stove, several old bathtubs and rotting fruit and vegetables stacked in boxes... Domitilo Gonzalez was charged with eight counts of animal cruelty, one count of sanitary nuisance because the place had no running water and dirty standing water, and 34 counts of confinement of animals where they do not have access to food or water. Gonzalez told a Herald photographer that the place has so much debris because he doesn't have enough time to clean up. He added: 'Besides, I can't do anything at night. When I come out at night my skin hurts because of the radiation from outer space.' He also said he fears Agent Orange being dumped on him from an overhead plane." Read article... Canadian army unable to find French-speaking Afghans Canada.com | Submitted by: lavgnr "Canadian troops have spread the word around Kabul for the past two months that they need a few dozen local residents who can work in French with the next contingent of troops arriving from Quebec. 'We can't find any who speak French right now,' said Lieut. Tim Button, the officer in charge of hiring the army's local interpreters. 'We've had one who showed up at the gate who claimed he spoke French, but when I spoke with him he didn't speak French at all. Not a word.' ... Some military interpreters re-examined their career options after suicide bombers killed a Canadian and a British soldier in two attacks last week. A total of seven soldiers were hurt while two translators escaped injury." Read article... Government powerless to prevent geeky baby name Holland Sentinel | Submitted by: Sak "There's a new kid in town, version 2.0. No, it's not a computer upgrade. The 2.0 belongs to Jon Blake Cusack 2.0 - that's his legal name - born Tuesday at Holland Community Hospital. Jon Blake Cusack, the newborn's father, who is self-employed with Westshore Design and Cusack Music, said he's an engineering geek and had the idea floating around for a few months. He spent the better part of that time convincing his wife, Jamie, of his naming idea. 'I wanted to find something different to name him besides Jon Blake,' Cusack, of Holland, said. 'The names "Jr." and "II" are too common.' At first, Jamie, who works with her husband, wasn't keen on the idea of having 2.0 added to the end of her newborn's name, but she finally conceded last week." Read article... Day of reckoning for Neil Bush's horndoggery Houston Chronicle | Submitted by: A. P. Palled "A Houston judge ordered DNA testing Friday to determine whether President Bush's brother Neil Bush fathered a child with another woman while he was married to Sharon Bush... Sharon Bush testified she heard rumors that her husband had an affair with Maria Andrews and is the father of her 3-year-old son, Thomas Alexander Andrews... Neil Bush voluntarily submitted a cheek swab for DNA testing in November and announced a month later that he and Maria Andrews had become engaged over chocolates and champagne at a French chateau. Wilson ordered Friday that Neil Bush's swab be analyzed for a DNA profile and that Robert and Thomas Andrews also submit swabs for testing." Read article...