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Daily Rotten Archives
May 9, 2005
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Mother Goose stomped to death
WJAR-TV 10 Providence | Submitted by: DRDeMento
"John Sanders was walking along a path on the grounds of Texas Instruments [...] when a goose hissed at him. Police said Sanders then fell down, became enraged and started attacking the goose. He also allegedly kicked and stomped the goose's goslings to death. Poice said Sanders had to have chased the babies to have killed all five."

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Police nab activists seeking Bush's nuke suitcase
Reuters | Submitted by: THE STRONG AND WHINING TOAD
"Dutch police arrested six activists on Sunday who said they wanted to enter President Bush's Netherlands hotel and look for the suitcase which allows him to activate nuclear weapons." ... "In a separate incident, an amateur photographer seriously hurt himself on Saturday by falling onto a spiked fence as he tried to photograph the tight security arrangements around the hotel."

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Captured Al-Qaeda kingpin is case of mistaken identity
Times | Submitted by: Bawdymonkey
"The capture of a supposed Al-Qaeda kingpin by Pakistani agents last week was hailed by President George W. Bush as a critical victory in the war on terror. According to European intelligence experts, however, Abu Faraj al-Libbi was not the terrorists’ third in command, as claimed, but a middle-ranker derided by one source as among the flotsam and jetsam of the organisation."

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Court nixes totally gay broadcast flag
Wired | Submitted by: BIZARRO HULK
"In a blow to the entertainment industry, a federal appeals court on Friday found that federal regulators overstepped their authority by requiring consumer-electronics manufacturers to help restrict digital home recording." ... "Public-interest groups, which opposed the original FCC order as unreasonably restricting fair-use rights, were beaming on Friday."

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Snake expert squeezed to death by giant snake
Sun | Submitted by: Monty
"A snake expert is reported to have been crushed to death by his giant pet python. Swede Erik Attmarsson, 28, was found dead in a house in Australia with the monster snake right beside him. It is feared the 17ft long beast suffocated him in a horrific attack."

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Methamphetamine + dog fucking = jail
titusvilleherald.com | Submitted by: rabid wookie
"Heidi McIntyre and Tina Smith, who were represented by Erie defense attorney Tim Lucas, faced a preliminary hearing before Titusville Area District Magesterial Judge Amy Nicols on one count of having sexual intercourse with an animal. According to a criminal complaint, the women were assisted by Douglas R. Peterson of Titusville on or about Oct. 4, 2004, with having sexual intercourse with a dog — a male mastiff — at Peterson’s residence. Peterson faces the same charge."

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There's a what guarding the house?
WKYC | Submitted by: Nancy's Gay Dad
"In addition to a guard dog, some Cleveland drug suspects also put their trust in a guard reptile. When sheriff’s deputies came to an alleged drug house on Thursday, they were first confronted with a friendly bulldog puppy. That wasn’t all."

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California bans hunting over the Internet
CNN | Submitted by: optional
"Wildlife regulators took the first step Tuesday to bar hunters from using the Internet to shoot animals, responding to a Texas Web site that planned to let users fire at real game with the click of a mouse." ... "Supporters have suggested the remote hunting could be beneficial for hunters with disabilities and questioned why Californians should be barred from patronizing a legitimate Texas business."

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Police chief still thinks Wayne Williams is innocent
CNN | Submitted by: anonymous
"Quite frankly, I don't think Wayne Williams is responsible for anything," [Police Chief Graham] said. "I don't think he did anything. I made up my mind with that 20 years ago, and I still feel that way." ... "Williams, still in prison, has never wavered from his stance that he is innocent of all the killings."

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Jesus Christ can't get driver's license
MSNBC | Submitted by: SADDAM BIN LADEN
"Jesus Christ is hoping to move to West Virginia, but he’s having trouble getting a driver’s license. The man is described as a white-haired businessman who’s been using that name for 15 years without a problem. He has a U.S. passport, Social Security card and Washington, D.C., driver’s license bearing the name Jesus Christ."

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